Heaven and Hell

Received this interesting one in the mail from Venkatron ... :)

Beauty and the Beast

For the past week I have been living at Mumbai Airport. In my spare time I am rushing for meetings across the length and breadth of India, drinking coffee to stay awake, rushing back to airports, visiting a place I used to call home for a quick shuteye and meeting the Nose of India.

If things described above aren’t bad enough to screw with your body clock there is nothing more jarring to the senses than a young bald man in a ghoulish wig. The man at security in front of me was puny, short, nondescript and was sulking. Maybe he’s not a morning person and thankfully there wasn’t a mike, cap or vest in sight.

As if to make up for the disturbing imagery earlier, God presented me a seat in the business section with a seat in the same row as Meow! Well I don’t know what you think of Jaane Tu … and frankly I thought the movie sucked. But this young damsel is attractive and I was just warming up to tell her that we shared something deep (We apparently share the same surname) and that such things are obviously indicative of long term synergies. Alas a matronly woman filled the empty seat that separated us – could have been Mommie, Chaperone or bodyguard – I don’t know.

Ms D’Souza, all of 21 years, curled up and slept well whilst I analyzed financial models … my head turning ever so often to check if a different kind of model a seat away would wake up and observe her surroundings with some interest. I toyed with the Handsome-Prince-with-a-kiss-that-brings-back-maidens-from-comatose-states fantasy a bit when the plane hit the tarmac. In minutes we were separated and I found myself at yet another airport.

Things in life balance out. High pitched nasal tones balance pretty upcoming actresses. The beast balances beauty. Maybe I should become a beast.

You don't need no graduation

I got this link from Sidin's blog. Apparently some program goes through your blog in like a few nano-seconds and pops up its impression of what kind of people read the trash you type. For a minute a conspiracy theory floated in my head which suggested that a kutty program somewhere did a random match-the-columns routine. (Entirely possible)

Anyway Pseudoforce did OK. We fall in 'High School' readers category. Which is not bad since the Greatest Common Divisor of education of all my friends who read this is above that level. And those, if any, below that level will not know what a blog is or read it anyway. Which means, to read my thoughts you don't need no graduation.

Corporate Fraud!

Having spent some time on Marketing in a BSchool and after going through the jargon that marketeers seem to pull out of their hats as frequently as Emran Hashmi's onscreen escapades, I have come to believe that there is no better way to con people into paying more or using more than what they would want than to play some Marketing jazz.

Dilbert feels the same! Marketeers! What do you have to say? ;)

Courtesy: Economic Times

All about Gordon DSouza you wanted to know but were afraid to ask

I have been taking arbit quizzes recently. It's a good stress busting / time wasting / see result-snort kinda thing. And its fun too. The culprit for this criminal waste of office time is a certain site called Brainfall. I got it through the news feed on facebook that serruptitiously tells me what my friends are doing.

So here goes ... Probably it might help you know me better ... or better still you'll know what to get me as a birthday present ;)


If I were a character from FRIENDS ... I would be Rachel Greene


"You are Rachel. You're very selfish and pay great attention to image. Spoiled when you were young, you were always the popular and snobbish kid. Although you hang on to your adolescent attributes, you grow more responsible every year."


Don't get me wrong here. I am not into crossdressing and not interested in a sex change. And I wasn't spoiled when I was young. Rather I toiled day and night like 'Opal Mehta' but I didn't get kissed though I got a life. So there ...


And now a look into my future ...

If I were an Action Hero ... I would be Daniel Craig


"You are Daniel Craig. Bond, James Bond. Keep up your suave style but don't forget to remain a bad ass. Money and romance is more your style, so don't get your hands too dirty. "


Now that says something doesn't it ... I confirm that I am completely and totally 101% DC. Except that I don't have fast cars, don't bed women every 10 minutes, hate techie gizmos, don't work for a detective agency, can't run the parkour, am afraid of dangling from overhead cranes, have never handled a gun, ... you get the drift


And speaking of style ...

If I were a drink ... I would be a Fine Glass of Wine

"You are a Fine Glass of Wine. You are sophisticated and refined, but also complicated and hard to deal with. Not everyone loves you, but those who do swear that you're the coolest thing since sliced bread. ..."

Ahem! Yes that I am (said in that sexy baritone voice of mine ... which you will hear if you call me when I'm having a bloody cold) ... Though Scotch on the rocks is my poison ... I'd settle for wine too ... wink wink .. remember the birthday present hint


Now a look into my past.

If I was in Hogwarts ... I would be in Gryffindor

"The Sorting Hat would put you in Gryffindor. You are bold, passionate, and brave. You have a highly-defined sense of right and wrong, and you are not afraid to speak your mind or fight for what you want."

Ok.

Going on ...

If I were a Harry Potter Character ... I would be ... It's a TIE!!! Part Harry and part Hermoine
"You are part Harry. You're a loyal and courageous friend. You'd do anything to protect the people you love, especially if it'll get you a break from class for a little while"
"You are part Hermione. You're a bookworm always in search of answers. When pressed, however, you can always be counted on to put away the books and help your friends"

Sigh. Those were the glorious school / college days.


And continuing to the most accurate guess by Brainfall till now

If I were to major in college ... I would major in Engineering

"Your major should be Engineering. Logic is your friend. With enough work, you can find a solution to anything... Unless it involves dating or parties."


It's true; and I am extremely proud of my engineering days. Grease ki kasam ... I am a true blue mechie boy .. though I did something in management later on I actually studied for my exams and was an exemplary student during VJ days.



For the darker side of me.

If I were a Disney Villain ... I would be Jafar

"You just want to be big and powerful... Is that so much to ask? I mean, you deserve it."

I AM big ... and powerful ... If you know what I mean ;)


And finally .. some kinky stuff ... which you have to live with if I'm around. Brainfall is not responsible for this. It is from another site


My lucky underwear colour is ... BLUE (Cheerio! Bravo bravo!!)

"You are caring and extroverted. You've made relationships your number one focus, and your lucky blue underwear can bring some balance to them.You thrive in one-on-one situations. You are a good listener and a natural born therapist. Sometimes you let the concerns of others become too important in your life, leading to stress and worry.If you want more balance, put on your blue underpants. They'll help you take care of yourself first."

Well Blue is my colour; and yes, ever since I have worn blue undies my life has been on an upswing (no pun intended!)


Hope these very informative metaphors have given you a much more deeper insight into my personality and my reason for being. Take a chance ... see what you actually are ... Its fun, believe me!

The forgetten nick

Last night while chatting with Anna, Nikunj and Rups after a long time was reminded of a nick that Nicks had coined many years ago at VJ. 'Max' was what they called me much before the 'Gordy' that Rups coined. Though later Gordy went on to become the nick that I was associated with from the second year onwards and later on here at MDI, Max remains the name that only Nicks and Anna use. It was a very nostalgic moment when they both used it during the chat, and I was immediately transported to the Eden Gardens (a patch of garden) in front of the Textile and Structural dept. at VJ. It was like we were there under the tree once again chatting like old times. I immediately changed the nick on my IP messenger (The local campus LAN messenger) and updated the status on Yahoo too!

The origins of Max probably go back to the day I was christened. Other than my family and a few close friends no one knows that my full name is 'Gordon Maxmillan DSouza' which was some years later distorted by the Maharashtra Govt., Dept of Education to include Dad's name as is the practice in India, where the fathers name is appended to wards name. And so was entered in the school records 'D'Souza Gordon Gerald'. (Surname First, Name and then Father's Name said the clerk sitting at the admin office! in that order) The name has stuck. Coz when I was apping to engineering college and then after that to MDI, I had to keep it the same as the name that appeared on my school records.

Why Maxmillan?
Maxmillan Kolbe was a Polish priest who chose to be killed in the place of a fellow Pole during the holocaust years in the World War II at one of the many concentration camps. Ultimately many years later on the 10th of October 1982, Fr. Maxmillan Kolbe was canonized by Pope John Paul II. And on that same day, same year I was born. So my parents thought it fit to name me after the great man.

Maxmillan has never seen any official records thanks to the Indian Govt. and most probably I'll leave it at that. I have always preferred to just enter all offical records with just Gordon DSouza. But I like Max. Feels like a part of me is pure and unaduleterated.